My Ring! Ahaha

[Elf of Sirannon]

katz, that page rocks! I'm so proud of what we have all created with this story (even though I stumbled in relatively late on the creation process).

[katzpotter]

Aw, thank you!

*feels loffed*

[Phëdriel]

Mae govannen, fellow Sues! Just as a heads up, please be aware that starting on Friday, Cami and I will be gone on a 2 week trip to (SQUEEEEEEEE!!!1!!2!2@!eleventyone!!!) Australia and New Zealand. So don't be surprised if we disappear for 2 weeks soon. ^_^

[celendil]

awww....*feels jealous* I wanna go to NZ...*pout*

well, katz is not the only one who is bored. I give you...Annundil.


And Annie.

[katzpotter]

AHEM. Galadriel uses SprklyWiteNKleen Bleech(TM).

Ooooh, now I want to go make some for Callie...

*runs off to dogpile*

EDIT:

Ooooh, looky!

[Loonie]

As the group continued talking, except Phëdriel who had left the room, Cathara leaned against the wall. Annundil had been talking about Caladiel and Ortherion, just looking at those two you could see love radiating from them. Cathara was happy for them, but she found herself not wanting to look at them. She couldn't look at them without being reminded of what she would more than likly never have. Love had never been part of her life plan, there was no room for it, but so much had changed.

Otherion had his arms around Caladiel again, they could keep their hands off each other. Will I ever find one like that? Look how happy Callie is. Cathara decided it was about time she left the room for a while, maybe find some 'waffles', food always helps at times like these.
*********************************************
I checked out the website, very cool!! I've sent you my profile.

[celendil]

hmmm...i was thinking about the website. I noticed our names are all down there, but could we maybe put up our (exaggerated) bios? for example, "celendil currently lives with her loving family somewhere in the United States. She would like to heartily thank the witness protection program for getting her to where she is today" or whatever. tHat WouLD toTAllY RawK!!!1!1!

[katzpotter]

Ahem. Those of you who have sent in their profiles will see them on the site.

Sounds like an awesome idea. If you'd like to send me your (not character) profiles, then I'll put them up!
*************

Caladiel was gently shaken awake by Ortherion, who was in just as much shock as she was.

"Orthie," she whispered, a pearly tear coursing down her cheek. He said nothing, only holding her close as she sobbed.

At last, he spoke. "We will not let it happen," he told her firmly. "We will prevent it in any way we can."

She nodded slowly, sniffling. Then she stood up. "You have helped me in many ways," she said softly. "Allow me now to help you. Let us go look for Tholinnas."

He stood as well, blinking in shock at her.

[Elf of Sirannon]

Hey, if anyone is bored they can certainly make a doll for Corin. I have no idea how to do it. Remember, she has brown hair and blue eyes, and wears a burgundy cape, and underneath it dresses in dark colours. And she carries a scimitar and a dagger. Thanks, dears.

I totally think we should make dolls for all the characters and put them in the profiles! Anyway, time for the next chapter.

*******************************************

"So, Tholinnas is your brother?" Annie asked Ortherion. The Elf nodded helpfully.

"And he fell into our world...when?"

"Several years ago in our time" Ortherion replied. "But I could not say for sure when he appeared in this age. I would venture that whatever vehicle transports one from one world to another cannot be predicted".

"So we don't even know if he's here?" Artanis pointed out.

There was a pause while the others tried not to think about that fact.

"Nay, he MUST be here!" Legolas said with much certainty. "Where else could he be? What kind of a story would this be otherwise? We must find him!"

"When was the last time strange Elves were heard to appear in this age, Lady Annie?" Corin asked.

Annie thought. "Well there were those three that landed a year ago, and one turned up around Christmas time."

"And there was that one that fell here last week" Nicole said.

"Really?" Aragorn said.

"No, you idiots" Nicole snapped. "As if we've ever heard of this kind of thing happening before! It's called sarcasm, morons".

"That was mean" Artanis said. "Even for me".

Nicole ignored her. "Whatever. Look, we don't know the first place to start looking for this guy".

"If anyone was asking my opinion, and I know they're not," Gimli spoke up, "I'd say we be practical about this. Where is the first place a scared, lonely Elf would go after they get unexplicibly transported to the fifth age?"

"He'd look for trees first" Legolas said wisely. "Yeah, trees, you gotta have trees".

"Why?" Nicole asked. "Wouldn't he look for help?"

"But trees are just so lovely" Legolas said.

"Trees are stupid" Nicole snapped.

"DON'T knock the trees!" Cathara cried, remembering from whence she came.

"Peace!" Corin said. "Nicole, you forget that many of our friends have strong ties to the forests of the world. Please, we must focus upon finding Tholinnas if we are ever to make it back to Theoden King in time for the battle. Legolas may be right, he might well have searched out trees first. Where is the nearest forest?"

"Pretty darn far away" Annie said.

"Might he not have dwelt in the parc for a time?" Ortherion asked.

"Doubt it. Homeless people get kicked out of that place, they wouldn't let a strange person with pointy ears live there" Nicole said.

"Nevertheless, he may have left a clue" Caladiel said. "We MUST find him".

***

Lucky it was 6 in the morning, because Annie & Nicole were quite self-conscious about the lump of odd-looking people who shuffled behind them on the footpath as they walked to the park. Terrified by the metal horseless carriages and strange metal birds that flew high in the sky, the Fellowship & Co. huddled together for safety, until they made it to the place called the parc. Ortherion and Legolas climbed into the few trees that were there and poked around looking for any runes that had been left behind, or markings showing an Elf had been there. But Elves are so good at not leaving tracks that even other Elves cannot always find them and their secrets are lost forever.

"Why doesn't that suprise me" Gimli said out of nowhere.

Aragorn, Gimli and Ronin hung around under the trees, trying to look like they were helping, and the maidens tried to fill in the time it would take until they found a clue. Across the street from the parc was a row of shops, and Corin enquired about them, as they looked like no marketplace or merchant's stall she had ever known. She asked to go and look at them from the outside, and Annie agreed to take her and the other maidens over. As males never ask for directions, even at the best of times, they knew it would be a while.

"That one's a newsagency" she explained as they walked past the first shop.

"Who are these people?" BloodFire asked, pointing to some pages wedged into some metal grid-like apparati.

"Oh, celebrities" Annie said. "Look, that is Phyllis, the supermodel. And Phillip, her boyfriend, the soccer player".

"Socka?" asked Phedriel, frowning.

"It's a game" Annie explained.

Artanis peered at the couple in the picture. "They both look so familiar" she said. "Who is it they remind me of?"

The woman in the picture was particularly tall for a fifth-age woman, and she had long flowing blonde hair, straight as a doornail. Her dress barely covered her ample bosom, and she had two of the most piercing blue eyes that had been seen so far in this age. She was on the arm of a taller man, also blonde. His hair was down past his shoulders, and he had a beard and dreamy brown eyes, and looked ruggedly handsome. Underneath them, though they couldn't read English runes, was written the caption, "Wedding Bells for Phillip & Phyllis!" and in smaller writing, "Medieval forest ceremony before they ride off on horseback!"

"They are getting married next month" Annie said. "They're a bit weird. Phyllis chains herself to trees and stuff to protect them from being cut down. And Phillip has this weird fixation with horses".

Artanis and Corin peered, both feeling a strange sense of pride, but they knew not from where it sprung. They glanced at each other for a moment, but the others had moved on, and they ran to follow.

"And these are all the news magazines. Here we have the Secretary General of the United Nations" Annie explained. "It's like a permanent Council of Elrond. This guy's name is Fabian Farmer. He's English. And that over there is the Prime Minister of England. His name is Samuel Gardner".

The others followed still, finding it interesting to see all these prominent people and who they were. Ah, times had changed.

"These magazines they are advertising here are the fashion ones" Annie explained. "Fashion is pretty big nowadays. For example, I wouldn't be seen dead wearing - "

She was cut off by a huge gasp from Caladiel. "Ai, ai!" she screamed in Elvish. "Orthie, come here quick!!!"

The other maidens ran to see what it was she stared at. Across the road, Legolas and Ortherion fell ungracefully out of the tree, and onto Ronin. Aragorn went to run, fell over, got up, and fell over again. The only one who made it over the road without disgracing himself was Gimli.

Caladiel was staring at the cover of a fashion magazine. On it's glossy pages was a man. Or, he looked like a man. They were not to know that his pointy ears had been airbrushed out. He was wearing nothing but a pair of jeans, and must have been covered in oil, for his shiny chest made every maiden drool, including Caladiel, until she caught herself. His pale golden hair spilled over his shoulders dreamily and he stared broodily out from underneath his black eyebrows. He looked a bit like Haldir, a bit like Legolas, but very much like Ortherion.

"Who..." Caladiel said. "Is that?"

"Oh, yeah" Nicole said, grinning. "That's Thomas Linnas, like, the SEXIEST guy on the planet. He's a male model. Recently voted Most Eligible Bachelor. I really do wonder why he hasn't hooked up with someone yet. Makes you wonder if he's gay, doesn't it?"

"Well, he doesn't look very happy" Aragorn said.

"Uh..." Nicole replied slowly.

Caladiel reached forward and touched the glass that seperated her and the image of Tholinnas. Ortherion put one hand to her waist.

"We have found him!" he whispered.

***********************************

Well, there's Tholinnas. I hope I didn't squish anyone's plans for who he was supposed to be in Modern earth. If I have, we can just edit "male model" to be whatever it is you wanted him to be. I'm sure the idea of him half naked on a poster is pleasing nonetheless.

And wasn't it fun to be introduced to some prominent personalities in the fifth age. Good old Fabian and Samuel. And isn't it a coincidence...Phyllis means "grean leaf" in Greek. Legolas means "green leaf" in Sindarin. Phillip means "horse lover" in Greek. Eomer means the same in Rohirric. And Artanis and Corin seemed awfully interested in them. I wonder who they are descended from? That's all I'm gonna say. Make of it what you will.

[katzpotter]

Yay!!!

I will type up a reply during lunch, as I need to get to class right now. But YAY!!!!!

Awesome ep-thingy!
*********************

"OMGWTFBBQ!!!!1!!" Caladiel squealed, turning around and hugging Ortherion tightly before kissing him. Everyone turned away as said kiss continued for several minutes, until Artanis decided that enough was enough and split them apart.

Cathara had moved up to look at the picture, and was staring at it intensely. "This is Tholinnas?" she asked quietly.

Ortherion nodded, grinning like a child who had just been told that he could have as many cookies as he wanted before supper.

"He's hot," she said, admiration flowing through her words. Ronin was looking a bit perplexed at his sister. She could not stand to look at Ortherion and Caladiel, and now she was drooling at this Elf? He did not understand. What change had come over her?

[queendiablo]

Wow. This is great I especially like the Phyllis and Phillip thing, although...Legolas and Eomer married? katz, I'll PM you our profiles. You can write Artanis and Callie's conversation if you want

***

After splitting up Caladiel and Ortherion, who were starting to make Artanis slightly paranoid, she continued to look at this Phillip person. He reminded her a lot of Eomer, and she got a strange fluttery feeling when she thought about the horselord.
"No." She said out loud. Caladiel frowned. "No no no."
"What?" Caladiel asked. Artanis looked completely freaked out. "Oh right. Come on you, we need to talk."

[katzpotter]

Right, I'll put those up ASAP. I still need profiles from BF and EoS, and I need author profiles from everyone except QD.

And QD, you can write up the convo. I'm working on putting the first parts up on the site!

[Loonie]

Just a note, Katz. If the members who have left, or anyone else, doesn't give you a profile. You could always use the ones posted when the thread began, remember this did begin just as a thread telling you how to make your own Mayry Sue and so every one who started already posted their characters profile.

[Elf of Sirannon]

lol - Actually I wasn't thinking of Phyllis and Phillip being Legolas and Eomer married. (Although that would be an interesting MPREG for any slash-fanatics out there Just personally - NOT GOIN' THERE!!! I have always found MPREG just...wrong!!! )

Anyway what I was elluding to was that supposeduly Phyllis is a descendant of Legolas and Corin, and Phillip a descendant of Eomer and Artanis. That's why Artanis and Corin were so proud when they looked at the picture - have you ever seen a grandmother at her grandchild's wedding day? Well imagine a great great great great great great (etcetc) grandmother on said day, and you see what I mean. :lol: Of course, these family trees are not set in stone. Do whatever you want with it. I just said they looked proud when they saw them. You guys can decide if you want to fiddle with this plotbunny at all.

katz corin's profile is coming soon, I swear!

[katzpotter]

That's what I was planning on doing, Loonie. Now only need character profiles from BF and Cami, and author profiles from everyone except EoS, QD, and cel.

Thank you all very much for helping me get this website set up!!

[celendil]

It's my pleasure, katz. I would help more, but i have absolutly no html knowledge. I'll just stick with the ideas then.
*******.
Now that Annundil had become normal again, She began to realize that she had not formally introduced herself to a few of the members of the Fellowship. Here goes nothing... she thought, and walked over to Corin.

“Excuse me…I gather you are Corin?”

Corin tore her eyes away from Legolas to look at Annundil. “Yes?”

‘Well…I noticed that you came with the Fellowship, so you must have joined them later…after I left…” Annundil trailed off into silence, feeling incredibly stupid and wishing Legolas wasn’t overhearing the whole conversation. Damn elves.

Corin only smiled, and pretended Annundil made perfect sense. “Yes. I come from Milchattias…” and proceeded to tell her story to Annundil.

“So,” Corin paused after telling her story. “I hear you are journeying with Frodo and Sam. What are they like?”

“Well, Sam’s all right, he’s lost a lot of his flab walking for months, Frodo is incredibly stupid and often just stares into the distance, ignoring everything around him (including me), and then there’s Gollum.” Annundil shuddered. “I think I would rather spend a lifetime locked up in a room with the Witch-King rather than Gollum.”

“So, how close to Mordor are they?”

“They’re in Ithielin. Faramir (stupid git) has captured them, and tried to kill Frodo for the Ring!”

Here Legolas, who was still listening to the conversation gasped. “Faramir tried to kill Frodo?”

“Ummm…yah.” And for that matter, so did I. she thought, but didn’t say aloud.

“Well, I hope they will be alright in the end.” Corin said, and Annundil, feeling the conversation was over, went over to talk to Annie.
****
In other news,

Corin!


(yes, I am still bored)

[viggo'slover]

After many hours of reading, 16 pages, a million pokes from someone who shall remane namelss, *cough*Katz*cough* and choking 3 times, I have finished reading MRA!!!!!!

For everyone who has written a piece...and then made me laugh while I was drinking, hence the 3 chokes

Then after another million pokes from She-who-will-not-be-named, I am creating a character for some Mary-Sue stardom!

Name: Vivica Gloomhaunter
Age: Ageless, but was recently reincarnated into a body of a 18 year old female body
Gender: At the moment- Female
Race: Vampire- in the form of a Human
Description: What do you think a Mary Vamp looks like? Long black hair and steely grey eyes (steely enough to get lost in forever though ) 5'8'' and every inch sculpted to perfection of course! Oh...and I suppose she wears clothes too!
Background: Ahem- In the perfect Mary Sue style, Vivica has no family and had seemed to pop out of nowhere (with fangs of course) In her ever long mission to consume blood and kill any power sucking evil-doers, she has been killed many times...but always gets reincarnated into another body (of her choice )
Weapons: With a stake, a dagger on a leather strap across her arm and one jabbed through a pair of boots Vivica was reincarnated...however while she was traveling across Rohan she managed to gain a broad sword (and sheath) and a horse (black) from a Rohirrim guard posted on border control.
Powers: Abitlity to be reincarnated...resonable at horseback and swords, better with daggers, best with hand to hand (and foot) combat.

Ahem- so without further ado heeeeeeeeeeeeere's Vivica!
---------------
Traveling through Rohan was hard work for a ADHD like person. Flat filelds, no shade, boring colors, and pretty much no one or anything for miles. So anyone with common sense would bring something to do...except Vivica who sometimes lacked thereof. Deciding that it would be too boring to just go to Gondor (she was coming from Upbourn where she was incarnated last) she rode to Edoras. Within a day she came to that ever popular capital of Rohan. The gates were locked. So naturally Vivica took out her daggers and used them cleverly as climbing spikes. She had only done this once before back in the second age to scale Mount Doom, before it was Mount Doom, to drop a naughty prisoner into an extreme jacuzzi.

Vivica toppled over the edge of the wall and landed on some peasent's house, falling through the straw and thatch roof and landing on a bed. Oh the beauty of luck, not for that poor peasent. 'Speaking of people- where are they?' thought Vivica searching the house finding food still left on the tables and clothes on the floor. She peaked out from the wood door of the house and saw to her surprise, no one.

Climbing up the hill on which Edoras was built on, the vampire headed towards Meuseld, the Golden Hall. As she climbed the stairs there were no guards at the door, instead there was a note nailed to the wall.

'Gone to Helm's Deep.

Be back soon.

Assuming that we don't lose.

Note will self destruct in 5 seconds.

Sincerly Theoden-King '

"Hmmmn, Helm's Deep...that should be about....NNW!" So off she troted on her horse, coincidentally named, Trotter, to Helm's Deep. Apparently she had missed a Post-it Parchment on her travels and that their had been some kind of attack. And so for a day she rode on through the notoriously boring landscape and to the Deep.
-----------
Hope it is good enough Don't want to ruin the gloriousness that is MRA!

V'SL

Testing...

Yay it works! Huzzah for Imagestation! Yup that is Vivica... all dark and goth-like and gloomy (perhaps that is why it is gloomhaunter) I think she needs a nice black cloak to go along...

V'SL

[Loonie]

Very nice. Hope we meet up soon.

[celendil]

Hi v'sl! a vampire in ME? that's one Mary Sue I haven't heard of...but very cool nonetheless. "Gloomhaunter" sounds Sueish, though.

[Loonie]

I like the idea of a vamp, suitable Sueish to twist ME like that .

[Elf of Sirannon]

and to VSL! Yay, we have another Sue! How exciting!!!! There were times I thought that the authors were the only ones who read this thread. COME ON IN THERE'S ALWAYS ROOM FOR MORE!!! And I love the Vamp-Sue - we have a few Dark Sues in this thread but not dark enough in my opinion, nor Buffy enough for that matter. Excellent crossover opportunities abound!

Thanks to Loonie for making that Corin doll, it is actually exactly how I pictured her! I particularly liked the exposed midriff bit. Did I forget to mention that Milchattiasian women ALL have belly button rings? Or that they get their husband-to-be's name tattooed somewhere (somewhere PG-rated!) on their body before their wedding? Did I neglect to mention those facts? Hmmm, OK. Well I mentioned them now.

I'm flirting with the idea of them all getting tongue rings too - mua ha ha. The best thing about Sues is having the ability to make huge sweeping cultural changes with a few keystrokes. Do you think tongue rings would fit in well in Middle Earth? *ponders this*

[katzpotter]

Originally Posted by Elf of Sirannon

And I love the Vamp-Sue - we have a few Dark Sues in this thread but not dark enough in my opinion, nor Buffy enough for that matter. Excellent crossover opportunities abound!

Mmmm... Spike....

Sorry. Just had to say that. Later today I will be puting the first parts of the story up on the website!!!

[viggo'slover]

w00t! Go katz! Have I mentioned how much I loved the site? Oh and I double the Spike swoonworthyness! You already have on vampire...why not two, eh?

EoS- Hehe...tongue rings. One of my camp consellors were talking to me about them. I said I had wanted one for 2 years. The she said I should wait another 3 years of wanting before I get it...There is just no going back (without surgery I suppose!)

Celendil- I haven't read on ewith a vampire in it....unless you've read some Buffy cross-over I wouldn't expect you would've either. Although a lot of MS stories have interesting characters in them that you would've never found in M-e....

V'SL

[Elf of Sirannon]

Tongue-rings...well, they do look pretty cool while you're still young...hmm, should I give her one?

You know what - just did!

Bam, there we go. I'll make it another thing Milchattiasian girls get when they get engaged, like tattoos. So coz Corin has already been engaged she has one. Except I'll make it she hasn't had her tatt yet. Good thing too. Who wants to go through their life with the name of a man you never even married written on you? *shudder*

I bet Legolas is the only Elf ever to exist who will know what it's like to kiss a maiden with a stud thru her tongue. HAHAHAH!

[queendiablo]

Katz, I sent you my author profile with the 'Sue profile? At least, I think I did...

V'SL, I like your Sue!!

And EoS - I saw what you meant about Phillip being a descendant of Eomer and Artanis It's just that the slasher in me awoke and started laughing hysterically at the prospect of Eomer and Legolas married. I hate MPreg. It's weird, and wrong

***

Artanis had stopped staring blankly at the photo of this Phillip long enough to realise that he didn't have Eomer's eyes. He had emerald green eyes, exactly like her's.
"I hate you, Eru." She muttered, feeling her face burn. She was NOT going to marry Eomer. They were NOT going to have kids. No. No.

[katzpotter]

Ick, MPreg. I have only read one of those, and it was a HP one, and it was hilarious. It was also the only R/Hr fic I ever enjoyed reading.

But I do like slash!

Am at school, website will be updated later, and QD, I got both profiles. You're cool.

[Elf of Sirannon]

Ai, ai! WTFBBQ!!!elventyone!!!! No posts since the wee hours of yesterday morning? *tut tut* We'll have to fix that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~``~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

It had been very quiet for a short period of time. Callie looked at Artanis who was staring at the rugged man in the photo. "No, no, no" she was mouthing slightly. Callie pushed her gently.

"What is up with you now?" she asked.

"Look" Artanis said. "Don't you see it?"

"See what?" Caladiel replied. When Artanis didn't reply, Caladiel grabbed her wrist and steered her away to talk in private, as chicks are wont to do.

Ortherion gazed at his lady, hoping she had not so quickly forgotten about his brother. He looked at the others almost awkwardly.

"Well, how do we find your brother?" Aragorn asked, and poor Ortherion realised they were waiting for an answer from him.

"Uh, that is an excellent question" he said. "Perhaps the Lady of the Wood can help?" He stood there for a moment, shut his eyes, put his fingers to his temples, tried to concentrate very hard, and emitted an odd "hmmm" sound.

"What is he doing?" Annie said loudly.

"Ssh" Legolas said. "The Lady of the Wood reads many hearts. Perhaps she can sense her kin in the fifth age".

They waited a very long time before Ortherion stopped hmmm-ing. When he stopped, he gave a sad sigh.

"She hears me not" he reported.

Legolas narrowed his eyes at him. "Really?"

"Uh..." Ortherion decided to speak in pig-Sindar, which fortunately Legolas understood, for Ortherion wanted none but his fellow Elf to understand his next statement. It was roughly translated as such:

"She is sunbaking on the beach at Valinor with an iced miruvor, and she told me to bugger off and not bother her again" he said.

"Ah" Legolas said. "Does she know how this thing ends then?

I believe she does, but I did not get that far" Orthie said. "She started shouting at someone and telling them to take care with the second coat of polish, and how she'd seen better French manicures in the Shire. I think it was the Lord Celeborn, because she also told the person to ask next time they wanted to borrow her silver dress".

"Anything else?"

Yes. Tholinnas is a disgrace to his Elven heritage to pose shirtless on the cover of "Trend" magazine".

"It's not called Trend" Legolas said. Didn't one of the fifth-age maidens say it was called Vogue?"

"Oh". Ortherion put his fingers back to his temples and hmmm-ed again. Then he came back to Legolas with a grin.

"She said, 'Oops, my bad'".

The two Elves grinned at one another. It was not every day one got Galadriel to admit failure, and they felt some sort of celebration was in order. However, they were still no better off in their Elf-finding quest than they had been before, despite this entertaining display of pig-Sindar. Ortherion looked mournfully back at his fetching-looking brother on the cover of the magazine. I wonder how they cut off the tips of his ears like that? he wondered momentarily.

"Nicole, Annie" he said. "Where might one find a...what did you call him?"

"Spunk? Hottie? Sex-god?" Nicole asked.

"No - that occupation you said he does now".

"Model" Nicole said wisely, ever the expert on occupations for sexy men.

"That's the one" Ortherion said. "Is there a barracks or some place where they all abide?"

"Uh, I think they stay in hotels and expensive places like that" Annie said. "You're better off finding out his agent and then locating him through them. Now, you are in luck, because I happen to have watched the 2004 Sexy Shirtless Hunk Competition on cable last month, and your brother won it. Part of his prize was a 3 year modelling contract with Gorgeous Models Inc. and their head office is right in this city".

Ortherion gave a whoop and did an Elvish version of the happy dance.

"Then let us not delay!" Corin said. "How far to this place?"

"Whoa, whoa" Nicole said. "As much as I hate for all of you to back into MY HOME, you can't run all over the city in those clothes. At least not in this time period. We've got to find you new clothes".

"Aww" Aragorn said. "But I like my tatty old coat. Do I really have to put on a different one?"

"Yes" Nicole said. "And, you especially, had better have a shower first".

"But I bathed in Lothlorien!" he protested.

BloodFire smacked him. "Arrers" she said patronisingly. "We're going to a place where there are lots of attractive guys. You already cracked it when all of these maidens chose the Elves over you. When you go to this place, you're going to look even scruffier. Look, pretend it's your coronation, we'll do your hair real nice, it'll be great".

"OK" he said, perking up slightly.

***

A few hours later, the Fellowship & Co. came walking down Nicole's street dressed in fifth age-threads. The mortal males were a good deal cleaner than they had previously been; the maidens were of course at their previous level of cleanliness, which was ultimately a very high level, because as we all know, women never get dirty, not even running over muddy plains, riding for days, or slaying Orcs.

They were indeed a sight to be seen. Coincidentally, Nicole's wardrobe fit the maidens perfectly, although some of the skirts were a tad short, and some of the tops a tad small, but that was OK, because they purely accented the third-age maidens' curves much better. Each maiden had selected for herself an appealing outfit, and there was much more flesh on display than when they had landed in Nicole's bedroom (except of course for Phedriel, who didn't want to bear skin but she had chosen tight clothes which were sexy as anyway). Legolas had a very hard time keeping his eyes off the jewel in his beloved's navel. I'll have to enquire about the significance of that later, he thought.

Elves, Men and Dwarf were all wearing items borrowed from Nicole's older brother's wardrobe. Gimli's outfit had needed a small number of adjustments but he did look rather cute in his baggy jeans, jacket and baseball cap. Ronin had also chosen for the surfer-skate look, and the maidens made a mental note not to lose him in the crowd, which would have been easy. Legolas, Aragorn and Ortherion were much taller than Nicole's older brother though, and they had to settle for wearing some of her father's business suits. They managed to find some sexy retro-looking shirts with wide lapels which matched the jackets very nicely - the jackets of course, were worn undone, and just the right amount of chest was showing underneath. Each one had his hair undone and flowing over his shoulders. Annie had instructed the three of them to try to look "smoldering"; they didn't quite know what she meant by that, but they tried their very best.

"I feel like I should write my name on him somewhere" Corin whispered to Caladiel, who nodded furiously.

And so it was that the group set off down the street, weaponless apart from as many knives that they could hide in their boots and underwear. Legolas and Ortherion felt naked without their bows, so they found it a tad hard to look "smoldering". Luckily, right at that moment, someone in the house opposite started to play Freestyler's "Push Up" extremely loudly, so as they went they got into the groove of the fully sick rhythm, which helped with the whole "smoldering" thing.

Their destination? The train station.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yes, I was listening to "Push Up" while I was writing this chapter. I was also listening to Christina Aguilera's "Car Wash", but thought "Push Up" would look sexier.

[Loonie]

Oh I liked that!!
**************************
The Fellowship arrived at the 'train station' and approached the ticket booth. The man in the booth looked up lazily at the large group. 'How many?' asked the man in a bored tone. A quick count confirmed there were 13, "Why should we tell you this? Who do you pay allegence to?" asked Aragorn.
The man looked rather bewildered, BF shoved Aragorn out of the way. "There are thirteen of us, now may we pass?"
"That'll be $100, you're lucky we're having a bit of a special today."
Nicoles mouth dropped, "$100! I don't have $100, especially not for train tickets."
Cathara was looking around the train station, she was quite pleased with her 'sunglasses' which were great for blocking out the sun and Nicole assured her looked 'cool'. She wandered over to the ticket booth where a disturbance was brewing. Aragorn seemed to be insisting that they get free travel since he is going to be King and the ticket booth man was starting to look scared.
"Look," said Nicole quietly to the ticket man "these people, they're not quite right if you know what I mean." The ticket man nodded as at this moment Ronin had discovered a light switch and was excitedly flipping it on and off.
"They're on a kind of ward field trip and we would seriously apprieciate it if you could over look the ticket thing."
By this time the ticket man would have done just about anything to get the rather scary people away from his booth so he hurriedly agreed.
The Fellowship walked off to wait for the train, many of them wanted to know what Nicole had said to the man to get the tickets but Nicole decided that they may take offence at being passed off as mentally ill.

[Elf of Sirannon]

"Why should we tell you this? Who do you pay allegence to?" asked Aragorn.

lol, I loved that bit. And Ronin with the light switch was funny, too.

[queendiablo]

Great, I loved it

***

Artanis had downright refused to wear a skirt, and was looking slightly uncomfortable. Nicole had loaned her a pair of black jeans, a green khurda top and a pair of black boots. She had tied her hair back in a long braid.

"Nicole, what is this contraption?" Legolas asked, his eyes wide and wary.
"It's a train. Don't worry about it." Nicole said calmly, sitting down. The large party were looking amazingly freaked out, and many other passengers were staring at them. Artanis noticed at least three females with their mouths wide open, staring at Legolas, Aragorn, Ronin and Ortherion. Caladiel hurriedly linked arms with Ortherion in the universally recognised 'This is MY man!' sign.

Legolas moved slightly closer to Corin, who was shooting suspicious glances at a particularly weird looking old man. He noted her look of unease and slipped his hand into hers.
"Thanks." She whispered, for the old man immediately looked away.

"Arrers, you look fantastic. Stop moping." BF said firmly, for Aragorn was looking decidedly downhearted.
"Huh." Was his intelligent answer. BF rolled her eyes, but was distracted by the sight of Artanis reaching angrily for her boot. There was a knife concealed in each one - the experienced warrior Elf had downright refused to go outside without arming herself first.